Ready to explore new ways to get in touch with yourself?
BY Yulia Rose

Are you ready to explore new ways to get in touch with yourself? Embody a new level of confidence? Create a new relationship with your sensuality?

In this article, we’ll dive into different techniques for self-pleasure so that you can make the most out of the experience. 

“There is a myriad of both physical and mental health benefits that come from masturbating,” says One Medical provider Christine Boyer, PA-C, AAHIVS. Research has shown that:

“Masturbation can reduce stress, help with sleep, improve self-esteem and body image, relieve menstrual cramps and muscle tension, and promote prostate health.”

women's torso hands touching chest

The basics of self-pleasure involve understanding what feels good to you. Whether that’s through manual stimulation with hands or toys, tantric self-pleasure rituals, fantasy or visualization exercises. It’s important to listen to your body and go at your own pace.

Exploring various ways of self-pleasure can also increase sensitivity in areas that are typically neglected during partnered sex, while creating a deeper connection to each other. 

In your pleasure practice you can rub, pinch, pull, squeeze, or tug your nipples, inner thighs, ears, neck, and other parts of your body during solo play.

From the perspective of High Sex, the purpose of learning to give yourself pleasure is not to achieve a bigger and better orgasm of release and ejaculation. This is only an enjoyable side effect. The true purpose is the transformation of genital orgasms into whole-body ecstasy.

The art of sexual ecstasy, Margot Anand, Tantric Master

Self-pleasure ritual

Self-pleasure is a fun, sexy, and safe way to explore your desires and learn what turns you on.

If you’re new to solo play, that’s OK. There’s no right or wrong when it comes to masturbation, so take the time to discover your body. Here is just one way to explore: 

  1. Create your sacred space. 
  2. Use your imagination to create an erotic environment.
  3. Turn on your favorite sensual music. 
  4. Use the things that turn you on. 
  5. Take off your clothes, spread your legs, and look at your genitals. 
  6. Take your time to stroke your genitals sensually, after covering your whole body in oil.
  7. Let your hands slide over your belly, let your fingers move through your pubic hair, and gently run your fingers along the outer and inner lips of your vulva.
  8. Start rubbing or stroking your clitoris through the hood. You can also form a “V” with your pointer and middle fingers and slide them up and down the sides of the clitoral shaft. Find a rhythm that makes you feel good.
  9. First massage your vaginal opening, then slowly insert your fingers (or sex toy) into your vagina. Make sure your vagina is wet or that you’ve applied enough lube to avoid friction.
  10. Start to move your fingers, Crystal wand or toy in a circular, in-and-out, stroking, or combination of motions. It’s best to use a “come hither” motion to stimulate your G-spot.
  11. Explore different strokes, touches, and pressures, and tease yourself by making circles around your genitals, light massage, and brushing the most sensitive parts gently.
  12. Caress the area around your anus, tightening and relaxing your anal muscles, accessing the pleasure of it.
  13. Breathe, take your time and release any pressure of what it’s supposed to look or feel like.
  14. Practice in focusing on sensation and breathing.